.bonds

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As humans we strive for bonds, for personal relationships. It’s in our nature to want to be part of a tribe or community. And as a result of the constant crave for a connection with someone, even from a distance, we run into heartache. Not just from failed attempts at love… But from failed attempts at trust. Trust in your fellow neighbor. In your fellow human….

To love and lose, in my opinion, is truly greater than to never have loved at all, as the saying goes… Because you have experienced what our hearts truly crave, even if it was only for a short period of time… But what about the consistent lack of decency when it comes to friendships? Or the bond between family members?
Since when did using a person to better your lack of self esteem and then trashing them when you don’t need whatever they offered you become normal?
I understand walking away from people in your life who no longer have purpose for your mission in this world or who no longer add something positive… What I’m getting at is using and abusing someone at your disposal and not just walking away but tarnishing their trust and security in even themselves.
Just because.
I’m at lack of words when it comes to this… I know most of you will say it is only normal for a narcissist… Or along those lines, but honestly, I see this behavior in so many types of people and it just baffles me….
Is it a lack of love all together? A lack of self love perhaps? I’m open for feedback here…. So tell me, why is it that people use, abuse and trample the people who have bend over backwards for them?

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.who you choose to be

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If you’re looking down at someone it had better be to help them get up…
Nothing irks me more than the callous eyes that lay a warm blanket of predetermined judgement on someone they know nothing about.
But what does judging mean?
It’s human nature to feel, observe and act accordingly to the people around you.
Judging to me means to treat someone differently than another because you don’t agree with something they do, are or have done. As if you have a right.

All of the great prophets and religious leaders teach the art of judging yourself before you do others….

Here’s a theory I like…. absorb what people have to offer. Accept it, embrace it, chew on it for a bit, then keep it to yourself. Don’t hand out unsolicited advice. Don’t treat them poorly or harshly because they have different views than you. Just let it be. Nothing more. Smile at the beauty of individualism, offer your support when it’s needed or asked for. And lift people up.
We all have a story. We shouldn’t be afraid to share it. We shouldn’t hide behind our imperfections. We shouldn’t fear isolation because we walk a different way.

Its simple knowledge. My son, who was 6 at the time taught me that I had done an awesome job at being a mom when he told me that he ended a fight in school between a Buddhist and a Christian (himself) by telling the other child that God speaks to people in anyway they need it. He appears to them that way too. Its the same God. With the same love. He just looks and sounds different to different people. There is no right or wrong way to love him. They ended up becoming best of friends.
I’ve never been prouder.

So love. Lift up the ones you love. Brighten someone’s day. Teach acceptance. Embrace love. And watch how your world will change.

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